Manager. Writer. Artist.(Yeaaaahhhhhhhhh!!! *Victory Dance*)

So, I have been job hunting. I have given one interview and they have been taking ages to get back to me. This is really funny. It can be ‘No’ which is fine atleast that way I know that one thing is done with.

Apart from that I have another interview on the 4th of March and then the PhD thing on the 8th of March. So well… things are happening and still in a limbo.
So anyways, rather than sitting and fretting about it which I do once in a while, I have decided to learn some skills on my own.

So the first thing that I wanted to learn was ----Tadda! Painting with water colors.

I dunno why I was hell bent on water colors. Maybe it is that hideous painting in my living room here. I am sure it is the copy of some great artist with a complicated French name but it is down right hideous.

I look at it often and think that I can def do a better job of it.

Anyways so today I spent a lot of time trying to figure out where in London I can get water colors. Most areas were too far off and in parts of London I have not been to before. Plus I was feeling a little down today with a bad throat and all. So I just set out of my home. Just like that. Looking around for paints. Aasking people where I can find them.

So that led me to the local post office. And there I found my paints and my paint brushes and some paper. I must say they are not of the best quality but I did not wish to invest in something I was trying out for the first time.

So well, I came home with all my stuff and got down to painting my first water color in ages.

I made 3 today. The 1st two are unfortunately only a little less hideous than the painting in my living room but I like the third one.

I have cheap bad brushes and few cheap colours but I still enjoyed the experience as I tried to copy what the video showed me ( I youtube-ed for water color landscape tutorials and such like).

So the following are the links of the stuff I have tried to copy followed with some pics for you guys to enjoy.

The purple flower
Youtube Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHdCq1upQ30



I don’t like this too much but then if you see the video it is a close match with what the lady has been drawing in the video. So I guess purpose served.

The weeping willow
Youtube Link : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WY-w_6DZS5g


Okay. Here I am quite happy with the background but I think the tree looks a little weird. As if some one has titled it to one side. The colors are too pale. Not too good but I guess do-able for the second attempt.

The African tree
Youtube Link: I am sorry I cannot find the link for this one I have just used. Thats unfortunate. Tch. Tch.





This is my favourite and I like this one quite a bit. It is simple, was easy to make and most importantly made me feel good! Yeaaayyyy!

As I was telling Sid, although right now I am not working … ok wait…I technically am working since I have not resigned from my previous job…and I have started writing short stories again my current designation/ designations is/are

1. Assistant Manager at a company I don’t work at
2. Writer
3. Artist
How cool is that!!!

Hehehe

Love
RP

This feels like London

I forget that I am in London. Okay. That came out wrong. The Brits try so hard to preserve all that is ancient and cultural that most places look very quaint and you hardly feel like you are living in one of the biggest cities of the world at the moment.

I live by the Thames. My house has an absolutely glorious view of the river. http://smilethesmile.blogspot.com/2010/01/river-thames.html).

Each time I go out and peep to my left I get to see what has now become my favourite view of the city. The way it should look. Powerful and Big. Don't get me wrong, I love the quaint bits to bits. Its just that I love seeing something in London look big. Evrything here including houses, rooms, ceiling, beds is just so tiny!!

Here is the view for you to look at :)

By the day



When the Sun sets



At night.(This pic does not even come close to 10% of the actual thing looks..but still..)



Are not these pretty ? :)

Conversations with the nurse

There is something called the NHS. UK provides you with health services free of cost (ofcrourse they take away 40-50 % of your salary as tax so they had better !) Sid and I had to register for the same. We wanted appointments together we got a slot 14 days later!

So anyways, we went on time and all. I was a little nervous when a shabby looking nurse called my name. she was wearing a crumpled looking shirt from under which I could easily see her huge belly hanging south wards!

So anyways, I went it. The first thing she says is “ In case you do not understand what I say ask me to repeat it and I will do so”. I smiled to myself and nodded a yes.

In some time she realized that I do understand the English she speaks so we kinda struck up a conversation.

“So, what do you do?”
“I am an MBA”, I said.
“What is an MBA?” she asked much to my horror.

“You become a manager”, I said.
She nodded her head. I was not sure that she got what I said.
“What will you do here?”
“I am looking for jobs and looking at PhD”
“What is a phd?”, she asked.

“You become a doctor with a phd , I said.
She shrugged her shoulders.

She took my BP and I was a little doubtful about the numbers so I asked her to repeat the diastolic and systolic figures ( when someone takes your bp they will give you 2 numbers. The above are medical names for the same).

The nurse who had just taken my BP, my pulse rate, my height, my weight and recommended me for another test, said “ I am sorry I do not know what that is”

OMG! OMG! Totally OMG! I feel so funny about NHS now!

And for those of you who are in India, enjoy the medical facilities there! Trust me you will miss them when you are out of india!

RP


P.S Sid went in next and the nurse figured that we are husband and wife.
“ You must be very scared of her,”, she asked my husband.
“ Why would that be”, asked Sid.
“She is soo clever!”, replied the nurse.
Hmpfff!

Short List

Those of you who have been following my posts for some time would know that I have been spending a lot of time working on my phd application.

The first thing I did when I finished B school was to get on with GMAT prep. GMAT prep was a blessing in disguise for me. I had just started work and was about to get married. So all the anxiety which in retrospect is natural for a bride to be would vanish the moment I would open my GMAT book. Plus it gave me a goal to work on which is one thing that always helps.

I gave TOEFL nine days before my wedding. When I came back from my honeymoon many office hours were spent trying to figure out a topic for the phd proposal and the one week I spent with my in laws was spent in penning down the two essays and changing most part of them and re writing them.

In the wee hours of 8th Jan, with my flight to London due in a couple of hours, I finished my essays and submitted my lone application for PhD.

So yes, it has been eventful. But fruitful as well. A fews days ago, I got a mail from the school telling me that I have been short listed for the interview.

I get to spend one whole day with some of the best profs in the marketing domain, get interviewed by them and hopefully meet some more students willing to get into the academic career.

I am excited about this opportunity and am looking forward to 8th of march which is when the interview should happen.

Wish me luck 

Till then,
RP

Dog Poop

I went out for a walk today in the evening. Outside one house right on the street was some dog poop, probably a day old. Next to it, the owner of the house had pasted this huge A4 size white paper on which was written

“ Not only is it disgusting but it is a criminal offence to leave your pets poop on the street. Come back and clean it.”

Haah!

The importance of speaking nicely!

Of late I have realized how important it is to speak nicely to people around you. Specially if they are important in your life. You might do all the right things but by speaking in an incorrect manner that might be too harsh, too aggressive you just take it all away.

I wonder why the way you speak makes all the diffrence in the world. I cannot find an answer. Maybe it is just me -I have been raised that way. I remember being scolded if I ever spoke rudely to anyone. I have realized through my interaction with others that I am not alone. No one likes to be spoken rudely but unfortunately people don’t think twice before being rude.

When you say/ do something bad to a person, he or she will take a long time to forget it. Really long time. Maybe he or she will never forget it. As they say, it is easier to forget something nice someone has done to you than it is to forget something bad said / done.

My mum speaks to me with too much of love in her voice. She showers love on me and sometimes, now specialy when I think of how nicely she ALWAYS speaks to me I just feel such a huge lump in my throat. I never realized that all people are not that way. I miss mum terribly. And I miss her solely because of how much she used to love me. It does not, at times, makes sense to me to be so far away from her.
I miss the last one year at home. I had a great job that was paying me really well for little or no work. I had great friends at office who were absolutely wonderful and I had mum and dad. I guess it is just one of those days…I cant stop thinking about my Mum. I would give anything to be with her right now. …………..

Best Friends

I don’t know if any of the readers from when I first started to blog 5 years ago are around. But if you are, you might remember my best friend N, I used to talk about.
N and I have known each other since we were in class 1 and have been best friends since class 5. We were together till class 12 after which I went to do an engg degree and she went to get a degree in fashion. However, I was still at home so whenever she would come back to meet her folks I would be right there. After that she left the country and moved to a place called Preston in the UK.

I then moved out of my city to do an MBA, however we still kept meeting as she would come home for diwali holi types when I would also be home.
Now I am in London and guess where N has been for the last 3 years???

LONDON!!!

And what is like super cool is that she lives twenty minutes from house by the tube!
So after 8 long years my best friend and I are together in the same city! And what a blessing that has been.

I absolutely do not know what I would have done here without N around. She is free on Mondays and Tuesdays which is when S is busy with office, so they have become ‘our’ days.

Mondays:
She comes home. I cook lunch for us. We talk for like 3-4 hours.

Tuesdays:
We meet at some station. And she takes me to some place she thinks I would like to see.

So the first Tuesday N & I went to Oxford street to do some all important shopping. Today N took me to a place called Covent Garden and Neal street. And, Oh my gawd!

That place is just so pretty. The cobbled streets and the tiny little shops that have so much of heart! I saw joke shops with the silliest stupidest things for sale. I saw shops with low white ceilings that looked like attics. There were shops where everything was pink and silver. There were people performing on the streets. There was an eating joint where entire meals were desserts. I checked out big stores and small little shops. I saw junk stores. It was just such a nice pleasant evening.
We walked for like 4-5 hours. We just kept on walking and talking. It is so funny with old friends. You might have spent the last decade on different continents but when you meet you meet like you were together yesterday.

We then walked to Trafalgar square. Clicked some mad pics. Walked some more. Lunched together. Laughed hysterically at crazy things. Did not know how time passed.
And as I sat on my bus home (was doing this on my own for the first time )I realized one very important thing. It is wonderful to spend time with your husband. Mine is a lot of fun to be around and pampers me with all the shopping and the eating out. That’s great but what is equally great and I must say equally important is girl time. You need to have girl friends you can hang out with. Laugh like crazy with. Spend hours with without yawing.

I don’t have a job right now. There are some interviews lined up for next week. I am more than grateful to have that opportunity given the situation in the UK right now.

But I am so glad I can spend time like this right now. I do not remember when I felt so free last.

My Mum says N is one of the very very very few people who make me genuinely happy.
I have known N for 19 years. I am 25 years old. Enough said.

To best friends.

R

River Thames.

Rives Thames flows right next to my house. In the last one week I have been in London, the one thing I have absolutely totally and completely fallen in love with is the Thames.

Our drawing room has wall sized windows looking into the river and I have started spending a lot of my time when S is not at home right next to the them.
The weather of London is as fickle as a loose minded girl. It changes in like a split second and trust me I am not exxageerating at all! Sitting by the window, in the comfort of my bright yellow razai, with the room heating on, I enjoy looking at whatever the weather has to offer. Rain. Snow. Winds. bright sunshine. Weak sun.

I can see a row of houses on the other side of the river lined a safe distance from it. If I crane my neck a little bit I can also see the big huge office buildings on the other end. Most importantly, however, I keep seeing people running on the banks.

I love that. I do not feel lonely, I keep doing my work and when ever I feel a little bored of what I am doing I peep out to see what the joggers are upto. They are quite a mad lot. You will see joggers/ runners in shorts when the temperature is a good -2 degrees and its snowing!

Some times young mothers get their kids in strollers and walk by the river. That’s a pleasant sight. At times giggly girls walk hand in hand. Sometime there is an artist who sits by the river with his canvas captivated by the river and the beauty that it offers.

Then there are the cyclists! In bright green or oarange. London is sparsely populated. Coming from the country I come from where there are more people than there is space, the river bank and the people that keep coming to run/ jog/ stroll make me miss the hustle and bustle of home a lot less.

The PhD application process

Okay, so I have applied for PhD in marketing. I submitted the application on 8th of January early morning, 3-4 hours before I was to leave home for the airport to catch my flight to London.

I had been working on the application almost ever since I left B-school which was March last year. I studied for and gave GMAT & TOEFl. Got a 740/800 and 115/120 in respectively. I only know how I managed to do all that along with a new job, the wedding preparations and the actual wedding. So with the exams done, the next step was to attack the application essays.

There were two. One was a ‘why PhD’ essay and the other was a thesis proposal. I spent a lot of time I had free in office to do research work for the latter. I would discuss the same with other Management trainees as well.

I was done with the first essay long back. However though I felt it was okay, there was indeed something missing. So, on 8th ( the last day of submission when I was staying with my in laws) I found a friend’s friend who was very good at reviewing essays and had offered to help me. He totally did not like my first essay but was thankfully happy with my second (which was more crucial as coming up with a new topic for PhD thesis in a couple of hours would have been next to impossible).

That day was quite mad. S was coming back from a 4 day official trip, we had to go pick him up and then do a lot of last minute packing, submit my essays and then get on the flight to London!

To start with it took us some 5 hours to go pick up S from the airport. A flat tyre on the fly over, and hyper congested roads were two big reasons why this happened. I came back to work on my essay. However, thankfully, I had to replace the whole thing and did not need to rewrite anything per se.

By 1 or maybe one thirty, I was done with my essay. I sent it to my friend who reviewed the whole thing and then we mailed it.

It has been a long process just applying for the PhD. I have just applied for one school. It is the best that can be offered here. I do not know if I am any good compared to the rest of the junta from round the globe who will also apply but I know I have worked hard on this.

More importantly this was one thing that kept me sane and quite and peaceful during the last 8-9 months when so much was happening in my life. Wish me luck , people. Getting an interview call alone would be big enough for me.

I will not know anything before March so for the time being it is all quiet and I am enjoying the ups and downs of domestic life.

Love

RP

London Fashion

The problem is that if you are new to London, no matter how (Sensibly) fashion conscious you have been in india, you WILL look out of place. Anyone with the littlest of brains can have one look at you and figure out that you are new to this place. Its ok to stand out if are looking ten times better than the rest of the junta, but not the coolest to stand out because you look like a misfit.

However, as I realized yesterday, just a little bit of sensible shopping can help you out here. That was the main reason why I went shopping yesterday. I got myself a pair of boots. That is like absolutely essential. Even grandmothers wear boots. The babes were I guess born in them, carrying a couple more in their baby hands!

Another essential item is a pair of woolen tights. That is like super essesntial here for the dresses and all. It is surprising how just a little bit of shopping can help you fit in so easily.

Everything is 50% off right now. I don’t think shop owners have an option- its so bad. Iike bathroom fittings are 50% off, clothes are 50% off and hand cream is 50% off. I find most items expensive at 50% rates, so I don’t really know how I will feel about shopping once the sale is off and all the stuff is back to the normal super expensive rates. Sigh!

Okay, women in London are very well dressed. By very I mean like VERY. Most of them are so perfectly turned out that if it weren’t rude I would just stare at them. May be it is the shadi effect but I just realized that I have not really paid any attention to how good/ bad the men look! Anyways, so the women and the girls have perfect make up, the dresses are absolutely drop dead gorgeous….

And most of them are just so so so tall! Trust me I saw a girl a few days back who was atleat 7 feet! She just would not end! And she looked just like those women they show on high fashion TV!

Anyways, I guess I have a lot to learn in terms of everything…..sometimes I feel glad I don’t have work right now. There is just so much to take in.

Love
RP

Realization

So it almost brought me to tears yesterday. In all the enthusiasm of being at home alone for the first time I had made a huge list of things to including emptying 2 suitcases, settling my cupboard, cleaning the entire house, cooking lunch for a friend who was coming over and cooking dinner for S’s friend.

I had been on my feet for some 12 hours straight when I first got a chance to sit down. I was just so absolutely dead tired. I took a breather and as I sat down with some dirty utensils in my hand, my thoughts went back to ma and how so many times she had done so many things for us without even letting us know how tired she must have been. And how no one realises it.

So, though I will never muster up I don’t know what to go upto her and tell her this, I would like her to know that now I can understand how much work she has been doing for us over the years. And, though it is quite late, I want to thank her in my head.

Thank you Ma.

RP

Day One in London

Okay, so after working for one month post my wedding and spending one very nice week with my in laws, I reached London on the 8th of January, 2009. Highlights

1.I got an upgrade to Business (Delhi to Dubai) and I hated taking it up as S did not get one.

2.We went walking yesterday when it was snowing like crazy. S showed me all the places I would know of from our phone conversations.

3.We lost our marriage certificate!

4.Hopefully some mahaan atma will find it and post it or something.

5.I made daal yesterday!

6.It is so so so so so cold.

7.I am now the proud owner of an oyster card!!!!

8.We did some grocery shopping yesterday, walked for like 2-3 hours and crashed dead at 8!

9.London is just so pretty and S tells me it looks prettier in the summers. Cant wait for March then!

Till THEN.

RP

4 days
Haldi and Headache.

What a day! Seriously! Oh My God!

It started off with some confusion between Sid and me about the reception lehenga but thankfully all of it soon got sorted out. After that I spent a lot of time with Rai jee (the driver Tauji has assigned to us) shopped for wedding baskets, got pics clicked. All that seems like it were ages ago!

After that the first pooja, that marks the beginning of the wedding festivities, happened. I am so yellow now!

Immediately after the haldi thingie, Mum, I and mehra aunty set of to do some shopping again.

Came back at around ten when a cousin and her family dropped by.

So that was it. Some highlights
• I thought I was speaking to sid, when I realized that it was actually his
dad. It was such an Ouch moment that I will not forget it in a hurry! :P

• Spoke to Dada, Nani, Aunty Uncle, Bhai before I sat for the haldi pooja

• I am sooo yellow

• I have this funny weird thing tied to my wrist that is making life exceptionally miserable!

• Spoke to NA after a long time

• I am amazed at how single handedly Ma is doing everything

• Interesting session with the RI guys! Sheesh man!

• I have realized that wedding is a very high pressure thing! There have been
so many many big small emergencies that it is exhausting me inside out!

• I am so looking forward to a day of rest.

Tomorrow is sundarkand ki pooja. The day after is the ladies sangeet! That is when I get to meet sid! Yipeeeeeeeee

6 Days
Shopping shopping shopping
Okay so since I am writing this a day late, I have already forgotten most of yesterday. It seems so so so far away.
I did so much of shopping that the credit card people called me up to find out if I have my credit card with 
I bought some stuff for Dad but am too happy with what I bought for S and see little opportunity for doing the same anytime before the wedding.

Not Like

I was as usual dead tired by the time I hit the bed. And I have no recollection about what happened last night except for the fact that I did fight with Sid.
Hehe

Then we reached KT which is where I like picked up 4 salwar suits. They are jhatka ones. In the morning when I was packing and repacking stuff I realized that in an attempt to not buy jhatka stuff all the stuff I had was very plain and simple. That was enough to send ma in a panic attack. Normally we would have taken some 4 hours to buy one nice expensive suit. Call it difficult times but today I bought 4 suits in like 20 minutes flat.

Tauji came over after that and made me wear all of those so that he could give me his expert comment on that!


I have not been myself lately. I have been feeling very over worked and all that but like Sid explained to me last night, its all to make sure that the wedding day is a nice one. It is for the both of us.

I wish I would soon get back to being myself. I don’t know how S puts up with me when I am in one of those moods. The first thing I loose when I get angry is logic. And even when he is sooooper angry, S always remains logical which makes things very simple for me…..


I hardly recall anything much about last night really

6 Days
Pati-to-be in apana Des!

Okay so Sid and I are in the same time zone for the first time in almost 5 months. I never realized that that could have such a positive impact on us!

Sid without work to worry about is so so so different and sooooo much more lovable than Sid with lots of office work to do and a home to manage. I am so not used to this Sid and so used to Sid in London that I had to ask him if he were a little high. He just sounded so relaxed, laughed at my feeble attempts at humor, had things to tell me, had some very nice things to say….So, yes I am very glad to have him home and am looking forward to seeing him this Sunday.:D

The first half yesterday was quite dull. Things picked up in the second half with Mum and me going out shopping!

I am just so so so so so so glad that I earn at this point of time and have money of my own to splurge. I feel it each time I take out my debit/ credit card to buy something I would never had bought were I not earning myself.

I spent a lot of time hunting for Sid’s flip flops but I guess I will have to go out for them once again.

Hair cut did not happen yesterday as Mum had a lot of other important work to deal with but should happen today! But yes the dentist visit it done. I see absolutely no difference in my teeth. :|

Last night Dad’s friend came over. He is a brilliant neurologist, topper of his batch all throughout and all that blah. He called me over and made me sit down with him for he had some tips for me. I am putting them down here for posterity.

• Doctors are next to God. There is no profession apart from that of a doctor’s where a man comes, gives you money and touches your feet before leaving. Know that you have the genes of sooo many doctors in you. Be proud of the fact.

• No matter how much you love your husband and his family (which you must and should), never ever forget the people who stayed up the whole night just to be with you when u were bawling your head off for no reason as a 6 month old.

• Self respect. Arrogance. Know the two and understand the difference. Never be arrogant in your marriage and never let any one mess with your self respect.

• You are not a door mat. Never let anyone treat you like that no matter how much you love them.

• Love as much as you would want to be loved.


Apart from this I had a sad conversation with a friend of my Mum who started crying on the phone with me cause I am now getting married. It is sad, the silence on the other end broken only by sobs. She kept telling me how much she loved me and how I am now going so very far from her…….

The night ended with a flurry of messages between Bhai me and N, which is quite common these days and I kind of like it very much. I sometime also message L a good night though not less frequently. Anyways, after that Bhai called me up (it was past mid night) and told me, in a very causal manner, all the details of the sclerosis patient (his case for the viva he must be giving as I type), including how he is vomiting blood and how only liver transplant can save his life. I know full details about bilirubin, how spider like things form on the skin, what a splenomegaly is and what a heptamegaly is. I could not sleep after the conversation and had to pick up ‘Villette’ and read it for 10 minutes before I could again fall asleep.:|

That is how another day ended.

Love
RP

7 days
Last Day @ Office

It was a nice day. I liked it. I distributed the wedding cards to the CEO, COO, HR head, Zonal team guys, CSD Head etc

It was nice to have a one on one with the CEO. He is such a no nonsense guy. What was funny was how the first thing he said when he found out that Sid is based out of London was to suggest that I should go to London and try my hand at LBS :P
I was so shocked! He told me he wanted 5 minutes with me if i could find the time. HahahHAHAHA

All the people I went to (and there were not many) were nice and all of them promised to be there.

My friends in office know how badly I want a hard disk and how I could not find time to get it and put movies in it.
They are acting so smart! They told me yesterday that it is not the right time to buy the hard disk and I should not waste my time on it. KC very casually asked me what kind of movies I liked. He he.

I left a ‘ Miss me and be there message’ on the soft board

RA, KC and I went to RC again and started giving me senti gyan like this is the last time you are coming as a single girl to RC with us and all that.:(
We made RA treat us cause he was getting a new lappy back in office...phew I get so senti about all this..dunno how i will be at the vidai!

Ok. Apart from that, nothing much happened, I took a lot of print outs in office- I think I finished one whole reel yesterday.

Back at home there was some tension about the reception lehenga so my folks made me wear it again and again we decided that it looks good and that lehenga stays.
In the morning also I tried the suit for the ladies sangeet with all the accessories-that’s also ok types I guess.

Called up RA and spoke to her for like an hour. Took a major decision which I think I am happy about if a little apprehensive!

Today is going to be a hectic day. I intend to shut both the suitcases today, go for a facial, get a hair cut, do some shopping for Sid, make the medicine box, do that work for Bhai- that should pretty much cost me the day.

And oh yes! Sid reaches India today!
Nice :)

8 Days
The ‘Blushing Bride to Be’

So today was the second last day at office before I start the longest break I have ever taken in my life so far.

And hence was the right time for the treat! I took SA, RA and KC (my friends from office and management trainees like myself) for the pre wedding treat. They had been after my life for soooo long. So we went to PI for lunch. It was, as usual a nice meal where these guys spent a lot of time wondering how I manage to do so much of nautanki all the time. When I kept on insisting that I do not do it purposely, it was concluded that nautanki is so much in me that I do it without knowing that I am doing it :|

Office was boring with the guy who we were supposed to report to absent from office for most of the day. We took out annual reports of the company and spent a great deal of time finding out the salaries of people around us. I never thought it would be so much fun!

Wedding shopping was minimal. I bought bangles for the ladies sangeet and jewellery needed for the Reception. So now all that is done and I can breathe easy.

Today onwards I am in the ‘Blushing bride to be’ mode. I shall be very coy and smile to myself most of the day and look v pretty all the time. (ok the last one was taking things too far, so maafi for the tongue of slip *blush* ).

Like I promised Ma, I shall eat and sleep properly from now on.

Love
RP


P.S *Blush* *Blush*

10

Today was TOEFL day. I am glad it is over. I don’t know how it went. I need a 100/120 and I am hoping I will get it. Otherwise I don’t know what I will do!

Anyways, finally I can concentrate on just one thing. ‘The’ one thing.

Just 2 more days of work remain before I start my break! No office till the the 3rd of December. That should be interesting 

Everyone keeps asks me how I am feeling, what is going on in that head of mine…I don’t really know.

Nothing. Sometimes

A gazillion things. Most of the times

Like N told me the other day, ‘other people get married na! It never happens to you!’….I think that was very well put. I sometimes feel I don’t really understand what a life changing thing marriage is. Maybe that’s good. The less you think the better it is.

Today was tiring. 4.5 hours of exam. Taxing.

I had no plans of doing anything much. I have been wasting my time, online, talking on the phone and generally doing nothing.

An aunt is coming over from the 11th itself. People have started coming over for the wedding! Can you beat that! My wedding is that close… heheheh

I have started rerererereading ‘Villette’ by Charlote Bronte. I can’t think of another book half as well written as Villette. I love the time I get to spend with that book. Fantastic!

The bride to be :|

I am getting married

I am trying to change my career 360 degrees

I have one more exam to study for and give

I am doing a full time job

I live at home and my folks need me there to decide the cards, decide the photographer, decide the decoration, decide the jwellery, decide the clothes, decide the gifts, decide the venue, decide every little thing and every big thing

I am the bride to be, so i need to find time to do all the bride to be things like an occasional facial, a hair spa which by the way i have not had any time to do even once

I am so totally going mad now.

Grrrrrrrr

vnvh

IF

“I think it all comes back to you. It is about what you have done and not really about how heart broken you were while doing it…..the way you might have treated someone, no matter how badly you wanted to treat that person the other way….no matter how hard you tried…no matter how much it mattered..no matter how difficult it is for you to forget…no matter how many millions of battles you fought in your own little feeble ways…no matter how again and again it all comes back to you…..no matter the zillions of tears…no matter the sheer helplessness….no matter how even the littlest of things takes you back….no matter how painful it is to go back..no matter how you long to go back for just a minute…no matter how horribly painful it still is and no matter that you know for a fact that it shall always and always remain so.”

Why? Why? WHY???

I will miss it all…..

By the time I get married I would have been engaged for almost 10 months, that’s like almost an year. So for the longest time ever I have been getting ready for the wedding. There is tonnes of shopping to do, dresses to get stitched, other stuff to look at, a job to go to each day, GMAT to study for give, Toefl to study for and give, Phd application to write, transcripts, recos, essays…..

So obviously more often than not I feel like I have too much on my plate managing everything. But I love it!!. I love the fact that on some days I am so tired that I cannot move a finger. I love the fact that my week ends are busier than week days! I love the fact that there is always so much to do!

Okay, it helps that when I leave home at 9 and come back at 9 Mum opens the door with the nicest, broadest smile that somehow makes all the exhaustion fly away. It really helps when I get up on Monday morning, even before I can open my eyes properly I somehow make my way to wherever Ma is and make her sit down and sit in her lap and pseudo sleep for some 10 minutes before she succeeds in pushing me away. It helps that Dad offers to drive and pick me up from office each day, just like he did when I was in school and in engg college. It helps that when I am really frustrated and uselessly pick up fights with Sid, he has the patience to make it all ok. It helps that I have some really great friends in office with whom I monkey around the whole day!!

I will miss all of this…..I will miss being the bride to be! I have been the bride-to-be for such a long time that it has almost grown on me! Where ever I go some one or the other teases me or pulls my leg about the wedding. Everyone has so many questions to ask. I used to get irritated- I have always been happy to be in the background and I hated it when all the attention was suddenly perpetually directed at me! But now I think when I am married and all this has quietened down, I shall miss it!!

I hate shopping. I just hate it now. Wedding shopping is vicious. It is wicked. I just does not end. It is like this mutant virus that refuses to be tamed. I hate it. The dislike is mutual. It hates me too. It hates me real bad now. It just does not end. Not even after months and months of it- it does not end.

I hate it but I know I will miss it when it ends. I will miss the wedding shopping. Damn it!

I will miss Ma’s constant threats about how like an ugly duckling I am bound to look at my wedding if I do not finish that particular half a glass of milk in the next five minutes!

I will miss the urgency that envelopes my home right now. There are so many things that need to be done, the so many details to be looked into. The so many little things one must not forget.

In fact once I am with Sid post the wedding there are so many things about Sid and me that I will miss. I will miss talking to him on the phone right before I sleep at night. I will miss staying up late just to speak to him after he finishes office. I will miss looking at the watch and immediately subconsciously deducting 4.5 hours from it. I will miss looking at the watch that says 12:30 and saying to myself, ‘ oh! Its just 8. I will miss waiting for his call. I will miss waiting for him to come to India. I will miss his voice on the phone. I will miss the 2 minute ISD ‘hi’ and’bye’ conversations. I will miss the hour long conversations.

I will miss doing all the nautanki I do with him that can only be done on phone. I will miss sending him good morning messages. I will miss sending him good night messages. I will miss making album of insignificant events in my life and mailing them to him. I will miss working with him on google spread sheets. I will miss sending him mails. Big ones. Small ones. Stupid ones. Angry ones. Mails that just say ‘I love you’.

I will miss this bitter sweet anxiety I feel constantly as the wedding date draws near. Life is about to change forever. And in a big way. And in a nice way. And in a happy way.

In the end I have just one little thing to say. I think if you can love someone with all your heart and more, you are more blessed than you think you are. :)

Good night,

Take care,

RP.

P.S. There is a letter from Sid to all you bloggers. He posted it as a comment on a post on him ½ days back. I am putting it here for all the regular bloggers here :)

Hiya All,

This is 'Sid' here... many thanks for all the kind words and these are much appreciated. Everything the missus has written in her post is true (ahem, ahem)... We are hopelessly in love and are about to tie the knot soon :D

More to follow.

Cheers,Sid.

Back!

Hi. So I gave GMAT today and was very relieved to see a 740 staring at me at the end of the exam.

I can now stop looking for dangling modifiers and subject verb agreement even while reading text messages and emails. :)

Okay so this post will be dedicated to my GMAT prep. It might not interest people with no interest in GMAT. Hence the warning :)

1. I decided around March that I need to give GMAT. Mid April I got my OG 11th edition for some 1100 bucks :
2. However, I was not studying properly. I mean, I was totally free and just did not want to do anything. Maybe that was coz I had just finished B school and no matter how much my mind told me to study, the heart would not listen

However during this time I did 0G11. I started with the diagnostc test and realised that (of all things!) my strength was Quant and the weakest link was Verbal. Though I must say, quant by and large was quite easy and English by most standards is difficult and needs a lot of work.

3. In this time I went to my Nani's place and gave GMAT prep there. I score 710 and 700 respectvely. That was fine I could have given GMAT then only, but something told me I could do better.

Then I decide to give my self a break and made a detailed study plan begining one week after work began.
I knew it was going to very hectic and it was foolish of me to waste the holidays but I also knew that when pushed for time, I am at my best.

4. I got my friend to get me books from Delh. I spent 2 whole days reading briefs from people who had cracked it and those who had not cracked it as well.
It gave a very good idea of what to do and what not to do. The idea behind reading briefs is to not follow blindly everything you read, but once you read a couple of briefs you will start seeing some common things. Those are things that have a high chance of working for you!Concentarte on them

5. I decided a few things

• First I decided to not do verbal from any source other than OG.
• I therefore did both OG 11 and OG 12. I did all the questions of verbal 3 times
• I also decided to not leave a single word in OG verbal unread.
• Therefore I spent a lot of time reading the explanations to SC, CR and RC questions.

With time, I started understanding the grammar bit and I knew why the correct answer was a correct answer which I now feel is most important.

Apart from this the only other non OG book I did for verbal was Kaplan 800 which supposedly takes your score from 700 to 750 :P

Well in my case maybe it did!!

6. For quant I did the last 50 questions of OG11,12 in PS and DS. I then hunted for tough GMAT maths problems and spent most of the time studying them.

7. Gave GMAT prep again. Score 740 and then 770 (!!!) and gave the test toady to finally score 740 :)

Thats all for today, am really tired now:)

Take care people.

RP

Quick Post

I am giving GMAT on the 24th of August, 2009. I need all the good wishes I can get. :)

Wish me luck.

Right now life is a little messy with office hours and GMAT prep. However I will be back to regular blogging once I am done with GMAT. There is just soooo much to tell you all

Love
RP

OP aka The Official Plan

So, now I have another target for myself. And like all those before this one, this too has to be shared with my fellow bloggers.

Phd.

And for Phd, GMAT has to be given. Now I feel that academics is the line for me, only thing is there is not enough money for me there. But I guess for once I shall let my heart do the thinking. I know that almost everyone who can is applying for a doctorate so competition this year is going to be very tough but well when have things been easy ?

So I have been working on and off for GMAT over the last 2 months. And these are the important points noted:
· According to the Powerprep S/W tests [ which are supposed to be the most accurate ones around] taken I should get a score of 700/800. This score is good, but LBS/Oxford/ Cambridge( I don’t remember which) says that although they would consider any score above 600 , anything above 700 would add a lot of weight . And boy I need as much weight as I can get !
· So, I need to up my score by 60-70 points. I know that is a harsh target, one that is difficult to achieve. However when were things easy?
· 760, if achieved would be phenomenal. Targets need to just that little bit phenomenal. And I am NOT going to be negative this time. I refuse to be that.

So, the next question is how do I do it?

· To start with, I have not practiced a single Data sufficiency question. Not a single one. So there is ample scope of learning there- some points that can be gained from DS
· I have not solved a single PS question (except the ones which I have done for the Power prep s/w)Again scope for points.
· Kaplan 800 might help. Even if it increases my score by 10 points
· Maintain a mistake log book

And the time table
With work beginning soon, how do I manage to fit in GMAT? This is how! Tadaaaa

· I am not starting at zero level. So that helps
· One hr of GMAT in the morning
· One hr after coming back from work
· Weekends are going to be off. So 4-5 hours each weekend.
· There are 5 sections in all. So one week for each section. Plus one week for practice/ anything else mebbe I feel like taking a break. So I will keep a one week buffer
· So a total of 6 weeks
· 18 hours in a week for 6 weeks=108 hours of GMAT work
· Officially will start from 2 week of work. So another one buffer week.

So that is the plan. Will try and update blog each day/ alternate day. Will bug you guys with GMAT now!!!
Muahahhahahahahhahahahahhahahahaha
Over and Out.
End of OP

Gud night, sleep tight
RP

Zidd karo, aur usse poora karo!

So, finally work begins for me in a few days from now! It will be the first time I shall start working full time. But as luck would have it, I have had to start job hunt before joining my company, which we shall call X from now on.

There are times when I don’t want to look for a new job, I want to just sit back and relax and enjoy having a job that pays me well and allows me to do the kind of work I want to do. But that is not to happen and I know I am being silly in thinking so.

As some of the regulars here know, Sid works on a different continent and post the wedding I shall have to join him. Now the entire continent in question is facing the worst of the economic crisis! As fate would have it, it is there that I have to job hunt. That too with almost no work experience.

As I started panicking yesterday when a senior told me grand tales about what an opportunity of a life time X is, Mum had to once again don the cap of my shrink! :P

So, yesterday I cribbed and threw tantrums about why I have to keep fighting ALL the time, Mum told me to remember this-

Zidd karo aur usko poori karo!

I hope I do keep this in mind.

So, finally I am at peace with myself. I am writing this in hope that whenever next I feel weird about what a fight life continuously is I shall remember what mum had to sayJ

You know, today I was watching an episode of Celebrity Apprentice in which one guy feeling very sorry for himself very angrily asks Donald Trump,” Do you have to get up every morning and fight?!!”

“Yes, and I do that every single day, for the entire day and have been doing that my entire life. My entire life has been a fight. One big fight! ”, replied Mr. Trump

In that one sentence ( ok ok ok for the puritans, 2) Mr. Trump rose a couple of thousand feet in my eyes. Not that what I think of him changes anything for him..but who knows…may be one day it might!

Introductions : )

Bloggers, meet Sid
Sid, meet the Bloggers
: )

Every couple has a story. I wanted to share ours with you.

When our parents got us talking I was totally not ready for it. When I met him first, I just went there to find reasons I could cite in front of my Mum and Dad and ask them to not bug me about him. However, as luck /destiny would have it I simply could not find one good enough. One meeting is too less a time, I figured, and decided to give him more time :P

But somewhere along the way, I still do not know when or how, I started waiting for his calls which came at odd hours as we live on different continents , I started sneaking out of useless lectures to take his call; he had started becoming important.

I took a lot of time before I said anything simply because I take time to think and decide. I don’t know where he got that patience from. Apart from an occasional sentence, he never forced me to give him an answer. Finally in an overcrowded South Indian restaurant, where there was such a din that Sid could not hear me the first time I said it, I told him indirectly that I believed he was the guy for me.

We got engaged some time back. : )

Sid and I have or rather, had, little in common.

Sid and I come from different states, have never been in the same schools or colleges and are very different temperamentally

Sid spent his childhood and the years after in different parts of the country and the world. I have lived in precisely 2 cities. 23 years in one and the next 2 in another.

Sid has therefore studied in more schools than I have had the occasion to visit.

Sid is what we used call a ‘def kid’, a term we used to refer to those kids in schools whose parents were in the defence services. My exposure to them, before I met Sid, and the defence forces in general has been limited to one girl [ yess, just ONE girl].

Sid loves F1 and the ‘kumbhakaran’ reincarnate that he can be on weekends, he manages to wake up at odd hours to catch a race. For me, uhh..welll…F1 came into existence when I met Sid.

Sid, in his words, ‘runs before he walks’ and I walk an extra 10 miles even when I know fully well that I can run better than others.

I am the biggest maggu on the planet, Sid thankfully is not : )

Sid is my teen age crush, college crush, first love –all that rolled into one and more. Sometimes I wonder what makes Sid and me click despite of our many obvious differences. I think it is just that. The differences are superficial- underneath we are pretty much similar. Both of us are essentially easy going and hard working people.

I love him for so many things: the mole on his chin; the black, honest eyes; the confidence; the love he showers on me. But mostly because he is fast turning out to be my best friend. He has been with me through a lot of things in the little time that we have known each other and I can easily sense a good, strong friendship brewing.

I respect him for so many things. This is very important, I always knew I could not love a man if I could not respect him! In fact with Sid it is so bad that professionally I want to be the female version of Sid! He eh ehe

Sid and I live on different continents and ours has been a long distance relationship since day one. It makes it a little tough knowing that you wont see the other for another 60 odd days but we have learnt to deal with it. It has been beautiful so far inspite of the thousands of miles that generally and obstinately stand between us :)

You guys have been with me through thick and thin and I just could not let all this happen in my life without giving you guys and update on it : )

Love
RP

A moment of vanity

Allow me this moment of vanity. The 6th Trimester results were announced this afternoon and I am now the official Rank One for our campus:)

A job well done? Yeah I guess.

But so many people came forward and helped me. There were times when I had had enough of fighting for the medal, when I was down and out but somehow there was always someone [ different people at different times] who helped me get out of that rut. I just want to thank them. Maybe I will when I meet them for the convocation.

I remember the day when my first tri results were announced. Before that I was just this quiet girl who used to study too much. I actually used to feel so small in class. I just knew nothing! No fin, no marketing. Hell, not even Microsoft Power Point!

I remember how all of us crowded around the soft board when the results were put up outside G1. The multitude of people. I tried to get in but I just could not. Then someone told me my result.I heard 3.43. Decent, I thought. Nothing great but not too bad either. So, this is where I stand. Beech mein. Na boht achcha na both bura. Two minutes later some one congratulated me. I had heard my score wrong! I had a 3.73/4. I was 3rd in my section and 5th in the batch. I was soo taken aback as I accepted the unexpected but very welcome congratulations! And suddenly I became visible to a lot of people. People started coming to me with doubts and help in project work. And I became the quiet girl who apparently knew a lot.

2nd and 3rd trimester results came out together. It was a Sunday/ Saturday and I was amongst the few doing their summer internship in the city. So I was staying on campus. It was mid afternoon and I had not had had anything to eat since morning. So, I had decided that I would go out and eat.I was on my way out of the quiet hostel when I saw this guy put up the results. From 3rd in my Section I was now 1 st in my Section and 3rd in the batch. I was all alone in the hostel expect for a few other people whom I was not very friendly with. So I had no one to celebrate it with. I remember I went out alone that afternoon just to treat myself! 
But I had done badly in the 3rd trimester. As in I was so not happy with the 3rd tri results. I felt I could have done much better.

The 4th trimester results! Hmmm..that result was the turning point. I was in my room in the hostel and I was working on something when a friend sent me a ‘ congrats topper’ message. I remember I called him up franctically. Desparately.

I had successfully managed what could be called an academic coup of sorts. I was the clear Rank 1 with 3.81, 2nd highest was 3.4 I guess and the girl who had been rank 1 till now had 3.2
That I believe changed the whole thing in my favour. 4th trimester was the 1st tri where we had to take up electives and I had, thanks to sensible advice from friends, chosen them very wisely with a potential medal in mind. I had done badly in the 3rd trimester so I worked very hard in the 4th. I knew I had the kind of subjects I could deal with very easily. I worked so hard and ate so little and slept so little that by the time I went back home after the trimester was over that I fell horribly sick and was found to be very weak.
But as I lay at home, sick and tired , putting in all kinds of antibiotics and vitamins into my enervated body, I knew for a fact that I had done the tri to the best of my abilities.

Somewhere along the 5th tri, 4th tri results were changed and mine sky rocketed to 3.91/4 . I remained Rank One and the difference between me and rank 2 and 3 widened further!

I remember 5th trimester exams well. I knew I was very close to a medal and only stupidity could take it from me. So I worked doubly hard. I used to put in so much of effort to make my answer scripts look better than those of my competitors. I remember that feeling of finally going through, for one last time, my answer script right before submitting it. It was all so neat and tidy, there were so many diagrams- complicated ones , it just looked, to my eyes [ and pardon my geekiness here] like a piece of art!

I found the out my 5th tri results after I had come back home. One of my friends who was travelling in the train then got to know of my result and messaged me the same. I was rank 1 again with all As except in a viva which had gone of reasonlay well. I had scored 3.88 and again rank 2 and 3 were far behind.

Today I found out my overall score. I have 3.79 , there is a tie for the 2nd place at 3.59 and the 3rd rank goes to a girl with 3.57

We have another campus and the medals are given to combined toppers. The results for the other campus is not out yet. So I don’t know for sure right now whether I will even get a medal but I have this to say:
All throughout so many things happened and there were times when things took a dramatic turn but even things that were not supposed to favour me just, somehow, upped my score. I don’t know how and I will always wonder why.

I was going through a lot of nonsense particularly during the 4th trimester yet I continued to work hard and the results remained good.

A lot of people helped me. However insignificant being Rank One at a B School might be, but I know for a fact that I could not have done it without their help. So, thank you.

I often felt like someone up there had decided that this girl has to top. I still think that I know very little- it is true. There are absolute Gods in my batch.

It is an honour to be Rank One. But it is double the honour to be called Rank one of the batch that was the 2007-09 batch!

Ah..Well.....

The last report has been made and just one more ppt is left. With that , this whole thing would come to an end for me and 116 others who I lived with for the last 2 years.

I have learnt more in the last 2 years than in the other 22 put together. It was the first time I stepped out of home.

The first time I saw alcohol and drunk men was at the freshers party here. I still cannot go on to the dance floor with those 100 odd drunk men. :P

I made some ossum friends. For various or should I say, the same reason I have had to let go of a couple of them. I will always wonder. Always.

I studied like there was no tomorrow. And, boy, I sure am glad that I did!

I will always regret not going to France for that Student Exchange- even if by some quirk of fate I end up spending the rest of my life in France. I honestly think I should have gone. Really.

I feel extremely apprehensive about my future. That does not seem justified coming from me at this point in time when so many worthy people are without jobs and I have a good one in hand. Yet I cannot help but feel that way.

There have been some major changes in my life of late. I don’t know whether they have been for the good or bad. That I guess time alone will tell.

Just feeling a little weird....I doont know what it is...

Love

RP

O Jerusalem!

It has been ages…or maybe it is the first time that I like a book so much. It was a desparate need for something to read that made me pick up this copy of ‘ O jerusalem’ a couple of days back. As it turns out I am so totally fascinated by the Jews and Jerusalem that it seems that the book is consuming every bit of my thought process.

The following is now one of my favourite bits in the book. It is a speech given by a lady called Golda Meir, who later became Israel’s 4th Prime Minister (She is, I gather the original Iron Lady ). Ms Meir had gone to the US to get the American Jews to donate money liberally. The American Jews were by now getting very weary of the constant demand for money that the Jewish community engaged in the Civil War (Arab Israel war of 1948). Before she went to US, $5 mn was expected, she went to US with a target of $25mn and when she came she had with her $50mn. Enjoy it J

“When I tell you that I have not come to the United States solely to prevent 700 thousand Jews from being wiped off from the face of the earth. During these last years the Jewish people have lost 6 million of their kind and it would be presumptuous indeed of us to remind the Jews of the world that 700 hundred thousand of them are in danger. That is not the question. If, however, these 700 thousand Jews survive, then the Jews of the world will survive with them and their freedom will be assured for ever. But if they do not, then there is little doubt that for centuries there will be no Jewish people, there will be no Jewish nation, and all our hopes will be smashed.
A Jewish state shall exist in Palestine. We shall fight for its birth. That is natural.
We shall pay for it with our blood. That is normal.
The best amongst us will fall. That is certain.
But what is equally certain is that our morale will not falter no matter how numerous our invaders might be. Invaders would come with cannon and armor. Against those weapons sooner or later our courage will have no meaning, for we will have ceased to exist.
I have come to ask the Jews of America for 24-30 million dollars to buy the heavy arms they would need to face the invaders’ cannon.
My friends, we live in a very brief present. When I tell you we need this money immediately, it does not mean next month or in 2 months. It means right now.
It is not to you to decide whether we shall continue our struggle or not. We shall fight. The Jewish community of Palestine will never hang the white flag before the Mufti of Jerusalem. But you can decide one thing- whether the victory will ours or the Mufti’s.”

When she came back David Ben- Gurion the 1st PM of Israel and the leader of the struggle for a separate Jewish state, had this to say to her -
“The day when history is written, Golda, it will be recorded that it was thanks to a Jewish woman that the Jewish state was born.”

Love
RP

P.S. I really want to visit Jerusalem now!

It was one of those days when very little of what happened made any sense. But the important thing is to take everything in your stride and move on…so that’s how it shall be.
Anyways, now coming to something which should be and is more important! I got placed! J
Things are very bad this year and most of my batch mates [ some of them I believe are much more deserving than I am, still unplaced].I got placed on the 9th of January this year, in the one company I had been chanting the name of for the past few weeks. It’s a good company,they pay well and the work hopefully will be good.
The purple shirt lived upto its name. And the newly styled hair definitely helped :P
More than anything else, I am very relieved. Very very relieved. If I had to go through today with all that tension of being jobless as well I dunno how I would have reacted.
Maybe I will come back later to give you guys a more detailed account of all that happened.Infact I think I will.See you later. Be good and Be strong.
Love
RP.

The previous links:
1.My first job interview
http://smilethesmile.blogspot.com/2006_06_01_archive.html
2. The second one
http://smilethesmile.blogspot.com/search?q=adobe

Some of my earliest memories

 

This other day I don’t why but I started thinking real hard trying to figure out my earliest memory. I spent considerable time on it and was completely lost thinking about it….I thought I will share them with you.

 

1.      Wearing a white frock with pink polka dots on it and dancing in the rain in this huge verandah at home as Dad clicked pictures of me. [I used to dance  a lot when I was younger, had almost completely stopped till some time back. However, I am planning to start again]

2.      Swinging on the white gate which led to our drive way, counting the cars that whizzed by, waiting for Dad to come back from his clinic.

3.      Dark and windy. It was very late in the night. Dad was not home yet. Mum was horribly scared. I had climbed the aforementioned gate and I remember wishing so bad that the next car would be Dad’s as I strained to hear the horn which I could and still can hear from atleast .75 of a kilometer.. [ you must remember these were ancient days where no mobile phones existed ] Nothing happened, it was just that there were too many patients that day and the phone was not working but I have never forgotten that night. This memory remains like a picture in my mind

4.      This girl called Geeta used to help Mum take care of me and Bhai. She was one of my first friends and we were ossum pals. She used to pick out the peas from rice for me so that I could eat the rice in peace

5.      The red lehenga I wore in Upper Prep for  my birthday. The first and the last time I wore oneJ

6.      My Mum used to put my brother and me to bed and to pre-empt any ladai, she used to sleep in between us. I remember this particular night like it were yesterday. My brother had this habit of telling a beeeeg long war story to some imaginary people who were very interested in it. So, there I was, trying to sleep , after as hard a day as any class one girl can have, while bhai continued with his story with all the sound effects. I remember complaining to mum.

7.      Mum’s silly bed time stories which always had a big monkey/elephant/giant who used to make life hell for these innocent villagers who then would come to either my brother or me for help and since we were super heroes of some order , we would in a matter of seconds after displaying not only great skill but also remarkable intelligence, annihilate the very existence of the monkey. Elephant/ giant.

8.      The big huge cradle which was as big as a double sized bed which was used by my cousin, me and finally my brother.

9.      Breaking into tears on seeing Mum cry. Ofcourse now I am not such a baby! Huh! Now I need to just see her look upset to start crying.*tries to look embarrassed*

10.  My parents think that we [ bhai and I] often used to fall asleep in the car.I don’t think I have ever fallen asleep in any car. I just pretended to be asleep as  I loved being carried back to my room in Dad’s arms as he tried all that he could to make sure that I did not ‘wake’ up.

11.  It used to be my favorite part of any Sunday. I used to get up late [around 8] and the whole room would be spotlessly clean and my Mum would be pottering around , looking so pretty in a saree with that red bindi on her forehead.

12.  Sitting in the garden with my Dad , about to leave for school. My Dad used to point out all the different flowers to me as I ate my breakfast

13.  “What do you think of all the time’, I had once asked my brother when I guess I was in class One or maybe younger

And now I think I can go on and on…..as they say , you never know when you are making a memory!

 

So that I remember....

Often under similar circumstances have I blogged.Often I have chosen not to and always have I regretted...
I dunno, maybe it was a lucky chance....but still it happened.Amidst all the nonsense that I was going through something nice was being planned for me.... Given all my modesty, in head I was on cloud nine! :)

Bleh!

It is one of those mornings when all seems wrong. It’s not like I haven’t had a morning like this in ages but its just that today I hope to write it off.

I am just so restless about so many things, there are things that don’t seem correct, I don’t know how to go about them, there is uncertainty all around…I suddenly don’t know if there is anyone I can talk about this to.

Generally I feel like talking it out with my Mum but Nani is not doing well and I dont want to make things worse for her.She can do with out my nonsense for some time .

There is just too much going on in my tiny li’l head, I guess.

Hopefully you guys are having a better time
Have a nice day,
RP.

Hey,
So, I am now well into the 5th Trimester. I came to Delhi on the 31st of June 2007 – it has been almost one and a half years ….it seems like eternity..almost as if I was always here, like this….A few random points that came to my head today

• There have been very high highs and very low lows in this time, the important thing is that I lived through it all ..hehe
• Today we had some industry hot shots and since it was a fin company I felt totally disconnected and disinterested. It was then that the fake-ness of it all hit me hard.
  o We were all in formals trying to look interested while playing with our cells/ ipods
  o Fake questions were asked
  o Fake answers given
  o Fake accents used
  o Fake smiles, fake interest, fake conversation
• I have not worked honestly on a competition in a long time, I think it is time I changed that. Amen.
• It is important to feel happy for others - very ,very, very important
• I am reading this book called the ‘The Last Moughal ’ and after a long time I find myself so captivated by what the author wants to tell me.
• Some times I have images in my head which I have never seen- I have imagined them while reading descriptions given in books. And Boy! Do they stay!! It takes me time to figure out that they are imagined and that I have not actually seen them! Parks, Beth, Mr. Darcy, Scarlett O’ Hara, the first world war, the tiger in the boat, Robert Langdon, Indira Gandhi with her Mum as she slowly died due to TB in Switzerland ,Benazir Bhutto while her Dad was being taken away from her, random woman in an Iranian Jail listening to the cries of a fellow inmate being tortured in the next room , a Muslim woman being hugged by the daughter of a her husband’s new wife-both of whom she has started to like , a scar that runs down the right side of her face , the blind Black man who walks with the dog, the island the kids run away to and try to survive on, Harry Potter, Fatty and Mr Goon, Geisha, Ms Havisham and the stair case, David ,Paul M Emanuel and his expressions and how much I hated him in the beginning and how badly I fell in love with him :P ,Lucy in the attic, the quilt, the road in Japan in 1940s, Lance Armstrong in the hospital bed and the nurse who was like an angel
  
  The list does not stop J
  And I am glad it does not.
  
  Love
  RP
  
  PS: to those who worry about my absence, the few readers who as my counter tells me frequent my place with a regularity that definitely is neither earned nor deserved, do not worry. No News, as they sometimes say, is good news. Take care and sleep tight:)