Saturday, May 13, 2006

Lonely Planet

blogger is increasingly becoming a plce where I come when I cannot handle whats going on inside me and have no control over what is goin on outside....

Very few people read my blog now, the old faithfuls are also infrequent now and that leaves me with a few readers who continue to read my rubbish..
But its good , i'll tell you why.
Coz like if u have loads of people reading ur blog then expectations rise..ppl start judging you...I mean it can get weird at times....
so i like it better this way.
'Blogging all the way' is increasingly becoming my own space , and the few people who frequent are people I have known for a considerable time(by blogger standards :) ) so they are most welcome to have a luk at whats goin on my mind..

You know life is all about I, me , myself. It really should be also.One should never give nay one importance.NO ONE.
Cuz if you do that, you tend to have expectations( well..i do) and then obviously ppl do not live up to those expectations and then you end up feeling bad...
Akele hi sahi hai....
sabse sahi....
akele aatein hain, akele hi jayenge....

I am spending increasing amount of time away from people....Officialy speaking I just have one friend in college and she is not in my branch also, other than that I have Latika who calls me up regularly( thank gaawd for that ) and in trying to keep herself sane ends up keeping me sane....
We meet rarely, our schedules are funny..my exams begin and hers end types..
I wish we could get together( u know, I still spell 'together' as to-get-her ) more often..but well...that does not seem to happen..plans are made and nothing comes out of it..
thats life I guess...
Its funny..i have known her since class 7..and yet in all these years..i have NEVER fought with her .Never. Ever.
Two girls not fighting?????
thats like the 10th wonder type of a thing...maybe cuz our temperaments are compliementary...

But anywayz..coming back to people..
Motto: Do NOT expect anything.It will always hurt.

hmmm..its funny you know, till sometime back I never believed this....but now I guess i do....

Books make good friends, though.:D

Take an imaginary situation.I am in need of help.Major help.
Who will I turn to?
Ma.
Dad.
Bhai.


bus...I truly cannot think of anyone else who I am sure will go out of his/her way to help me out.....and that makes it extremely funny.
like there are millions of people on this planet but only 3 people for me...look at earth , it is sooo crowded with people, each one living his own miserable , lonely life...
But then I have 3 people...hmm...maybe a lot of people do not even have 3 people they can easily call their own.
hmm..thats indeed a possibilty.
I frankly am in favour of >2 kids....2 is wayyy tooo less....
Like if i wonder who other than ma and dad will be there for me....I cannot think of a second name....
Bhai and then full stop.

Full stop.
:D

Raam Pyari.

-----
added later.
i need to get out of this mood.
real quick!!
Life is as complex as I make it.
Life is as sad as I make it.
nuthing makes any sense. I just ned to sleep.:( :( :( :(
Atleast blogger listens to me!*sigh*

18 comments:

Sumit Tada said...

Oyeeeeee....i missed so many posts!!!
Will read them all on friday evening and will post comments on each.....we have blitzkrieg next week.....5 end-sems in 5 days flat!!!
And the best part is that i started preparation this week only.........
Hope you wont mind...

R said...

haan haan...plz eggjams doh!!!
5 din mein 5!!!!!!
gosh!!!
humarein 10 days mein 6...one day ke gap parr...
tue se shuru

waise i juss commented on ur blog....

ranjan said...

Bina Tere naa ek pal ho,
naa bin tere koi kal ho
Yeh dil ban jaaye patthar kaa
Naa ismein koi hulchul ho :P,

Hai naa max appealing scenario :)), ofcourse frrm the song Ya Ali !..

Tk care :)

R said...

yess..its best if one does not have feelings...

no feelings
no expectations.

Anonymous said...

oh oh! itna chaotic mood!!..dnt worry b happy is all i can say:)!

expectations r gud but the problem is tht we expect too much..we xpect the things to go lik we xpected and wen things go in an unexpected manner it hurts:)!!..human nature!huh!

vaise how many ppl do u think will turn to u in case they need help?..aise hi..general question:p!may b ur answer lies here!!-Ms.Happening!!!

Abhi said...

Maybe it's fine not to expect anything.But about the lonely part , people will come to you if you open up your mind.Mother Teresa dint wait for the poor leprosy patient to help her , she came ahead and took him as her child , and she had one more person who loved her.You can make the world your family , its all in the mind.and bete ji , I still read your blog , remember the original Mr.50 % .:)

Lotus Reads said...

The blogosphere is a funny place, Ruchi. I have also found that my readers fluctuate a great deal. Some weeks they arrive in droves and at other times the place looks so deserted one would have to wonder if disease or pestilence has wiped out blogger's land! :) Anyway, I truly enjoy your blog...keep those thoughts flowing.

R said...

creepu beti:
//vaise how many ppl do u think will turn to u in case they need help?..

i thot and i thot..i think 4.
:D

abhi yess, you are correct...:)
but I am no Mother Teresa..but yess, one can learn from her:)
Mr 50%....hehehe..yess, i remembr and most fondly so..tho i must say that i did not know u visit my blog regularly..after u removed my poor rubbish bloggie from ur blog list I presumed u had stopped cuming regularly...:)
anywayz, nice to know that that is nt the case....keep cuming:)


lotus: i know and I am more than okay with the few ppl who visit me..(and that includes u also, beware !!!)

as they say---
chota pariwaar , sukhi pariwaar.
:D
p.s. samajh mein nahi aaya ho toh boliyega.

p.s. shuchks man!! I meant tht if u did not get it, lemme know

Neha Sinha said...

:O:O

sad??..

//Very few people read my blog now,

why do u feel so. i used to. but i always like me,i, self[egoist?]...and if i do visit other blogs..dunno it makes me feel as if i am compelling others to visit mine's. something like ...

oyee have been reading your posts na..jus that....am not commenting..and yahan connection ke bott prob hain..:((

i hope you get out of that mood jaldi se..and be ur rocking self.:D



take care...have phunnnnnnnnn :D

R said...

chotu sigh!
kya behaki behaki batz karri hai!!!!!

//i do visit other blogs..dunno it makes me feel as if i am compelling others to visit mine's.

yeh kya???
hain???
bol bol???
but then ek reason hai iska
tu meri cujjn naa
toh meri khopadi toh ulti hai...teri bhi genetics ki wajah se ho gayi hogi re..
aisa matt soch
jiskoh nee ana hoga woh nee ayega c..jisko tera blog achcha lagta hai woh ayega hi...
jaise mein aati hoon
*blush blush*

Anonymous said...

i can sense the undercurrent..again against me rite?

Unknown said...

That was a very deep post Ruchi!
I don't know whats on exactly in your mind but I can understand to some extent coz the kind of stuff you put in your post (which reflects your mind) always keep wandering thru mine too!

Pata hai bacha, when it comes to expectations.. I believe, its not that you purposely go towards it.. it comes naturally! I mean.. expectations arise naturally when you get close to anyone!

I've faced many people in life.. Many became friends, quite a number got close too and most of them left me too! Am not boasting but I'm one person who accepts all her friends 'unconditionally' and I can do anything to make them happy, go out of my way to solve their probs, even at the bloody cost of my own happiness.. besides I don't even like them thanking me and I also shout at them if they apologise for anything to me.. but still.. I couldn't save myself from the clutches of 'expectations'! :(

After a certain point, it arises naturally and you can't stop it!!! Though I too personally feel that this so called 'expectation' only gives rise to your sadness, depression etc.

Anyways.. Hope you're feeling better now :)

Keep Smiling Always,
God Bless you dear,
Take care,
Aarti

Unknown said...

Phew!

Raam Pyari behen...
Main to kuch zyada hi keh gayi!!!

Aapke dil ka haal padte padte, main apne baare mein bohot kuch bol gayi :O:O

Bohot zyada lamba comment ho gaya na?!?!?!

Anyways... sorry.. bohot pakaya :|

Take care,
Aarti

aMyth! said...

Man! So many people having this insanely chaotic phaze of late!! I seriously wonder if this has anything to do with the global warming!!! Hmmm...

Hey, if it's any consolation...I have started visiting ur blog more often of late, taking the total regulars up by one more :)

Chill yaar!

R said...

aarti behen::D
nee, nee yaar
its nice to hear abt the tuff that goes in ur mind...
i see that most people are indeed quite similar, maybe thats why so many of us identify with each other soooo much...
plz speak ur heart out here...
ppl like u are always welcumm
and as u can gather i am indeed okay now..
its justa phase when everything looks bleak that i end up riting posts like this....
but i also undersatnd now that
most of us go thru similar things..
waise u sound like a nice friend to have..
mere dost banoge?

R said...

amythheheh..plz keep visiting, visit as often as u wish to,,,,:)

han, i gather global warming is the culprit..
or
hmmm,,,,
maybe
videshi takat ha haath???

Unknown said...

Raam pyari behennnnnnnnn...

Hum vaapas aa gayi hun..
Aapki jaan khaane ke liye :D

Fikar not.. hum kahin nahi jaungi ;) aur humne to aapko behen bana diya.. aap dosti ke liye pooch rahe ho?!?!?!

Defintely bacchha.. we can definitely be good friends and will be.. Am always open (& emotional) to friendships :P

Got mannny of your posts to catch up with...

Take care dear,
Aarti :)

Unknown said...
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