For the uninitiated ,'gundi' is the female of a 'gunda' and for the super uninitiated a 'gunda' is also called a ' luchcha' and a 'lafanga' .
(A very common gaali ( infact , the only gaali )used by yours truly is L.L.B= Luchcha Lafanga Badmash)
raam raam..anyways enough of gyaan for a day!
Well, so I had been behaving like a gundi till some time back as in I was not studying enough...which was very bad..I used to conjure up the grandest of plans but nothing would materialise and that was terribly badd...but then my percentile in the AIMCATs used to be pretty gud and the city ranks were so terribly nice to hear that I think I was becoming complacent ..till last sunday.
*bach ground mujeek, ekta kapoor ishtyle*
I wrote my AIMCAT and when I summed my DI marks I realised to my sheer, utter horror that my sectional score was -0.33!!!!!!!!! (negative jeero point three three, for the uninitiated)
On top of that I had missed two pages in that 50 page question booklet and thereby had not even attempted 7 simple 30 seconds english questions.
Anyone who has ever known anyone who has ever written CAT knows how important 7 marks can be
So, all in all, I wrote a miserable miserable, miserable AIMCAT...got the lowest %ile till date( dunno if the decreasing %ile is going to be a continuing phenomenon or not ) and by farrrrrrrrr the lowest city rank till date..*double, triple sigh!*
Infact , to make things sound terribly ugly, lemme add that this time the city rank was more than two times the previous lowest..It was also the first time that I got a city rank that was in double digits....
tch tch tch
When I logged on to check my AIMCAT result this tuesday,even though I knew I had done miserably, I just sat there staring at the screen for 5-10 minutes....unable to believe what I was seeing.
So,I knew that something was going wrong somewhere and I thought and I thought and I thought.....
I now know that I had been getting overtly tensed about CAT..I get very anxious about it and spend a lot of time thinking about it.....which is sheer stupidity....
Also I have given up IIM totally....no, I do not intend to stop working for CAT, not at all...far from it...but I am no longer obsessed about it..I am not thinking about..it just reduces my efficiency if I think too much about anything...
If IIM or nay other good insti happens...it shall be brilliant but if it does not things shall still be okay...
This seems to be working for me...(tw) I am happier working, am enjoying the prep much more and all in all I am putting lesser pressure on myself.I am therefore quite busy with prep right now, I ake my deadlines and make sure I work according to them...31st July is an important date for me as by then I need to finish each and every basic thing related to CAT.... finally I sat down and got myself a plan of action and I hope to be able to stick by it!
Apart from that, without meaning to demean myself lemme add that there are certain things that one deserves to get and some that one does not deserve. However this neither means that no undeserving person shall get something good nor does it mean that one should stop working hard...I have tremendous faith and super tremendous respect for hard work..so as usual , I shall work hard..but as the Geeta says, it is only 'karma ' that is in our hands..the ultimate result is beyond us....This is not negative thinking..this is simply ' no thinking'!
Thiking is injurious to health.
If a gud b-skul has to happen then so be it
If it does not have to happen....then...err..ummm......I am a slim, fair, sweet natured , convent educated girl from a respectable Brahmin family of Northern India who will be earning a 6 figure salary p.a. in a year's time ..dot dot dot
Blush blush blush!