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Why is it that at times things happen in such a way that i feel totally helpless, i do see unfair things happening to people who are very important to me but then what can i do???? they feel better having told me of all their wordly problems but what about me?? I'm just so helpless ....the matters are such that i cannot find a solution for them... and everytime, hundreds of times a day, each time i come face to face with them i am again given a full blown account of those genuinely dumb problems.. What CAN i do except feel bad for them..?Things can go so terribly wrong at times..they can be so miserable , so bleak , so dark and the beauty of it all-------they are all man made!
I'm just so totally fed up with some things....

THE SAME OL' RUT
Collleg has begun..and is in full swing at that! Its just the same old story but the tension levels are high for a no. of reasons ,namely:

1. I am in third year ( you are supposed to gape and shriek at that, by the way) .
2.The campus placements begin at the end of this year.
3. So all throughout this year we shall be given graphic reasons why no (read NO) company will take us.
4. I am not that intersted in placements right now, but then i also know that if i do not get a placement i shall be howling and crying like crazy ( i wonder if that would qualify as abnormal behaviour.?)
5.What i am intersted in is MBA, so at times ( atleast ) i will have to study for CAT also. Thats added pressure...
6.I need to get a life...
7.I do not know how to get one.
8. i need to stop being such a looser...
9. I do not know how to stop being one..
I am just feeling extremely irritated at i dont know what..!!!!Well anyways i guess most people are bugged up about what s happening in their lives when they do not have any real cuase to be bugged up..I guess i'm just one of those people...

CELEBRATION TIME!!!!!

Okay, i just have one small thing to say....Nivindya has got a place in a university she really wanted ! Shes real happy and so am i.
So, herz a big big big CONGRATULATIONS to her...Keep up the good work.
Totally proud of you!

FRIENDS

" Friends are like melons,
Shall i tell you why...
To find one good ,
You must a hundred try!"

Everone in his/her lifetime subconsciously tries a lot of people as friends( almost like the hundreds of pairs of jeans that one has to try to find that perfect fit!).Well you know that she/he is a real good friend when the two of you-

1. Jab jab jab and jab!!!!
2. Agree to disagree.
3. be okay about not in the least liking the others romantic interest . ( wink, wink, wink)
4. Share laughter (nothing like being able to laugh together.)
5. Giggle non stop.
6. Finish each others sentences.
7. Say the same things at the same time.
8. Then root for telepathy.
9. Always have something to talk about ( even after years and years of knowing each other)
10. feel lighter after having told each other about the endless mundane problems that have to be braved.
11. Feel nice and warm after a long conversation.
12. Can discuss anything( read anything!!)
13. Calling the whole thing off is never even an option.
14. Know what irritates the other.
15. feel that the other one is family.

Thank God for friends!!

OUR FRIEND, THE REPORTER.......

Its quite funny ( in a certain way...) these supposed news channels... They are supposed to keep you updated with everyhting thats going on around you. And i am getting exceedingly suspicious that they have taken 'everything' at face value. And more often than not i find my self extremely amused at the antics of these news starved reporters...
Take for example Aaj Tak( sabse tez...) or maybe it was NDTV (what difference does it make any ways..) .Well sometime back Govinda and his family were hurt in the car accident and the news starved reporters clapped and cheered coz they finally had something to make reports about.
You should have seen the news piece on that to believe it! The camera was inside the hospital and they were interviewing Govinda's son. The boy was asked where it hurt him the most, simple 'chota sa' boy that he is , he gave the simple chota sa reply, " kahiin nahi ", without ofcourse realising how badly dissapointed the reporter would be. But the reporter was very smart and chose not to relent. He had already decided on the next line and irrespective of what the boy said he WAS going to say it. So he concluded," As is quite obvious , the boy who is in extreme pain ...."
( The boy in the aforementioned ( and non existant) extreme pain lay on the bed in the background surely skeptical about the reporters sanity)
The rest of the peice basically included Govinda's wife insisting that the kids are both out of danger and the reporter insiting that they were in bad shape...
Now coming to Aamir Khan , he apparently has another son mothered by a firangan Jessica-something. Entry , our close friend who does all that he can to make us aware, the news starved reporter.These people actually made a half an hour documentary on that! It was creatively divided into segments called'kalam ki kamai'( Jessica is a writer and hence the name of this segement), 'Jaan ka naam'( the boys name is jaan..) etc etc....(I was actually flabbergasted .The Ekta kapoor soaps show the same stuff , right ? And moreover they dont pretend to be ultra arcane, abstruse etc etc... atleast they do not have subtitles like 'Smart news for Smart People..!!!!! )
Now , finally , coming to Sahara Samay.Apparently if a manhole cover on your street is missing, chances are that Sahara Samaya is sweating all over trying to get that exclusive interview of the man residing in the house just infront of the manhole. SS people are like real amzing! See i think the time is not far off when if a dead pig is found dead on some unnamed street in Unnav, A news reader in the news room will importantly say," And now before we discuss the Budget , we are joined by Dr. Ram Lakhan, Vetenary doctor, Unnav who was in the vicinity when the pig (fondly called piknu by his owners son) died. So, doc sa'ab, what exactly do you think was going on in the mind of Pinku when he breathed his last?"

WANDERINGS
It does come to mind ( often at that too) what life has in store for me. I mean there are loads of things i know here is no use thinking about coz i know thinkung wont help in the least but i cant help but wonder.
Like what would i be like in say exactly 10 years. I would be 31 at that time and some very important decisions would have been made by then( hopefully).Would i be fat or remain slim? Would i have started looking real jaded and thorougly bored with life?
Would i be doing a typical and regular 9 to 5 job or i would have found my true calling( i really have no idea even now what my calling would be like!!) And so on and so forth..Would be realtively healthy...Which city would i be in? Would i have good friends?..and so and so forth....
I have started feeling( i now i degress here ..) very strongly about CAT, though i do realise that this is what i have to do, but then i want to know why? You know the worst part is that i dont even want the money! Money is essential but not worth the hell that i will have to go through to get througha good b- school...I have no idea.. the funniest part is that i dont even like the concept of a 9 to 5 job. Every thing that a real good B school so faithfully promises is low on my priority list.. then WHY????
But then i think i like the concept of studying further. Btech from here shall NOT suffice, i need another degree. However a M.Tech is not even an option because i simply hate technology ( i mean i dont hate using it, i just hate learing it and making it and so on..) GRE does not fascinate...no point in going abroad when your parents are earning money in rupees. So, there i am without any more options ... sO I guess i will do an MBA no matter how much useless i find it:)

DEPRESSED!!!
I have been feeling so terribly depressed of late that i cannot even begin to fathom the reason behind it. My chuttiz have been dragging too long - that could be one valid reason. Another could be the fact that i am sans extremely close friends now.... I mean the ones that i'm lke really close to are either not in the city or have their colleges going on.... moreover i think it would be nice to hang out here and there but that is not happening. Maybe that is the price one has to pay for being too choosy about friends. I , however cannot help it if i do not want to be ' best- friends' with every other person i know. And i also think that i'm being very reasonable when i do the aforementioned......
This , i hope is a passing phase and once when college opens i shall be happy and busy as a bee....!!!!

THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY
the good

1. Got a gorgeous 'payal' from nani!!!
2. Told younger bro on his face that he is akin to the lowest form of pond life ( ha! ha! ha!)
3. Held the door open for an old lady at the bank.
4. And as i was doing so i could feel the milk of human kindness sloshing inside me...
5. Asked the waiter at an eating joint how big the 8 inch pizza was.
6. Got a major kick out of that!


the bad

1. Friend A told me that that there are as many dogs in b'lore as there are engineers.
2. Went to my father for some sympathy...he heard what i had to say...thought for a moment and said," dogs kum honge"
3. Whatever!!!
4. Watched a movie in a theatre with no ac!
5. Saw a relatively huge bird sitting inside one of the coolers that was not working ( i mean the cooler not the bird) ...spent atleast half of the movie time watching the bird
6. All The other coolers (which were without birds and working ) were pretending to be heaters!

the ugly

1.Saw 'War of the worlds ' in hindi
2. The old woman for whom i held the door open at the bank turned her blazing eyes at me and yelled at me ( a repersentative of the uncooth , uncivilised younger generation ) for being soo patronising, disparaging and( there wa one more word she used... yes!) condescending!
3. never in my life again will i hold doors open for old ppl to walk past and THEN yell at me!!!
4. Made 4 rotis yeaterday.

URD-KI-DAAL.....
well..well....well...i got up today to find a visibly harried 'kamwali' telling ma that sumone has (i really dont know how to put this in english!) done some kind of black magic to divert the problems of their household to ours!!! ( Exclamation Exclamation Exclamation)

Quite excited and overflowing with joyous anticipation i followed her to where the stuff was expecting to see something along the lines of a skull and a doll with pins in it and the such like...however this was not to be...all i saw was some 'urd-ki-daal' littered near the main gate!
That was ALL!!!!!!
Spoiling the name of black magic i should say!!!

Any ways ma got a bit harried nevertheless... and an emergency family meeting was like immmediately called for!Therein we spent a good couple of hours speculating on the whos and the whys ...the obvious suspects are some of the very superstitious neighbours we have around....hOWever the undecurrent of extreme tension beffitting this solemn occassion was missing coz of majority of us rolling down our respective chairs and deewans laughing our heads off...

The 'kamwali' looked postively hurt at such a response and therefore proceeded to give us a detailed account of her brother -in-law who has been reduced to a good for nothing drunkard after someone did something with the aforementioned 'urd-ki-dal!' This horrific tale of the hidden potential of the inocuous looking 'urd-ki-daal' however did not bring the desired effect either with bro coming up with the brilliant suggestin of picking up the daal and asking the 'kamwali' to prepare for all o us something lipsmackingly delicious!!!

THe horrified look on the 'kamwali's' face was again suuficient to sent us all( most o us had sombered down by that time) into a fresh ebullitions of unrestrained mirth which again pained the 'kamwali ' no end who looked ready to smack bro on the head with the jhadu both of wich( i mean the jhadu and bro's head ) were in easy reach! ...
All in all not a very good day for the 'kamwali'

READING......

I wonder why reading is such a passion...infact i cannot even begin to understand why some people do not want to read!!!! i would be so limited in my view of things had i not been an avid reader...You know what... it might sound like very hackneyed and sorts but the fact of the matter remins that books are a man's best friend Or for that matter a womans!! !
However i am indeed facing a major problem with reading these days..which is that i am becoming increasingly choosy about which books i want to read . It is a bigger problem than you might consider it to be... When you look at a book( by which i dont really mean just look but also like read the title and the little something about it that is written at the back of the book) you should instantly feel like reading it...but that has ceased to happen now.. which has lead to very sorry state of affairs...I just am not able to find the knid of books that that i might want to read...
I did not even like Dan Brown's Da Vinci Code!!!!!! I almost did not like the last of the Harry Potter books either( gape! gape! shriek!!!) I mean like evrybody likes these atleast...
I really do not know when that perfect book that i am craving for will come my way...
Hoping that that sometime is sometime soon...
Bye the way i am reading a P.G.Wodehouse at the present and i do ilke it but it's just like a filler..i am reading it coz i am not able to find something else that i might like really like....

The simple reason why i have finally started blogging is that i am extremely bored.... Another reason is that i am in the habbit of writting extremely loong e-mails...i really dont know how blogging would help but one can always hope...
well..another reason is that i need to find a vent to outlet my craving to write..
so here it is hoping to blog pretty regularly!!!!!