Monday, November 21, 2005

I dunno when this feeling will go....i dont want it to linger and gnaw at my insides.....i want it to go away..i have been feeling so many negative things these past few days and today was by far the worst....i dunno why but i am feeling very stressed..every thing went wrong today...right from 5:00 in the morning...through the stupid economics lecture ( this female who was taking the lecture got ultra impressed coz i knew that peter drucker died a coupla o days ago..she wanted to know my name and what i planned to do after BTech and silly things of that sort...which made the girls , who are sick of me getting the attention in class, exchange a couple of thousand looks) followed by the lunch break wherein inorder torevise the 4 chapters of IWT i stayed in the lecture theatre,all alone, in the process missingl lunch.... then the lecturer came..looks at me studying and shez like..."don't you know? the quiz has been postponed for tomm"
So there was poor me, studying jdbc when i should have been giving mah quiz...then there is X. No, i am not the lets-bitch-about-her types....but there are certain things i CANNOT tolerate and i can only wonder how long it will be before she gets a piece of my mind....These things include bossiness( i dont throw my weight around but i cant stand ppl who do..) ask her to get up at 7:30 to do the project..no, she has to sleep...okay how about tomm evening..well ruchi, i stay in the hostel and humare pass kaam ho sakata hai shaam mein .okay how about morning 9:30...naah you cant expect me o be up by that time if i sleep at 3 come abi?
Im like , see i havent eaten anything lemme go eat something in the mean while you guys carry on..i'll join u ppl in half an hour...
shez like i dont have the time to explain the same thing to ten ppl ten times.
You know i wish i could retort..but i hate, HATE fights of any type..so i just kept shut.. did nt speak a word..so there were three of us...no one else in sight..my bak turned towards the other 2, X facing in the opposite direction..and the 3rd girl( shez very very seedha saadha..and its partly coz of her that i'm not saying anything right now..coz i dun want her to ..i dunno...shez nice..) trying to diffuse the tension....My point is be civil guys!!! just atleast be civil .be decent, behave nicely!!!!!There is no need to be rude and difficult!!!! I mean its like if i go and speak to X she'll be gracious enough to speak to me but elsewise we'll be standing next to each other and not a word!! Gosh i simply hate it!!!! Shes not even a 'good friend' but like why this kind of a behaviour????
I answer in class...and she has become very quiet.
I am being made the ass- co of something and she'll tell me that the whole evnt is crap.
I get more marks than her in the midsems and she wont speak to me for 3 days.
It has been said that 2 girls who are equally good academically can neva be friends..but i beg to disagree...If Nivindya was first in class i was second, if i was first she was second....and if neither of was 1st (like in 11th and 12th) Latika was....so like it was always one of us.... Marks were important to both of us....the net difference in the grand total used to be (more than once) a single mark!!!! one whole term..and difference of a single mark.... and we were+are+shall remain(tw) the bestest of friends........
Missing you loads.......come to India jaldi jaldi :( Tumm Btech kar lo na plzz mere colg se ....then i wont hafta bear all these ppl. .:(
So many more things on my mind..but i dont think i'll write them here..and i just studied for 3 hrs today :(
tata
ruchi.
p.s. got 14.5(= 15)/15 in economics and 27/30 in IWT minor....
p.s. my neighbours sangeet today..i went there ...stood alone in the corner for 5 minutes looking at ppl going crazy dancing and felt so far from the madding crowd and left the place quiely...
p.s. excuse the bad grammar + spellings+long post

20 comments:

dots said...

hey hey...
sending you tonnes of hugs+loads of soothing massages+reams of friendly smiles..
dont be so upset yar..i know this feeling very well.but dont worry..never fear..nivindya is here.
i will personally strangle that girl..how dare she be so petty nd menial! nd i know u hate fights..so when i come home, u take me to ur colg nd i will fite for u..i really dont mind..nd im really serious.
yar..these people have no life..all the pleasure they get is in being the komolikas of day to day life! i pity them..
does ur colg hav an MA course in design??i can join that..
:)
chirrup my janeman..smile smile smile smile..:)
nd SMILE! :D

ranjan said...

Awwwwwww, cummon, life is not so bad, we can only make it as bad as we wish..hai na ? :)...

Waise one qn..how come no guys in ur project grrp ? dats pretty strange !

And u know wat, someday u will look back at all of this, and die laughing :-), so plz eat some more chocolates !!

amit said...

cant really help tht....in a grp u hv to tolerate all kind of people....some happily some with a grudge...... but theek hai yaar, in life u dont get only friendly n 'I like u' kinda people.

Shreyansh said...

Some posts are too personal to comment on . Even on 'public' blogs. So I would rather not comment.

Oops ... did I just.. :)

Anonymous said...

arre raam , iss ladki ko kaha daal diye re .know wat , ek situation hoti hai.and maan le tu usmein hai .now u interact with this situation .This does not hurt , hurt is something which comes frm the way u perceive , interpret , understand and expect the situation .the source of hurt is not the situation , but the way ur conscious and subconscious mind reacts to this situation.and as long as u cant change the situation , u can change the way u react to it.bring down ur expectations , decide that u wnt let these uncaring people to mess up ur peace of mind , and u wnt let ur happiness go for a toss coz of em .so chill out , u got better people in ur life.look at the beauty , and life feels beautiful.

R said...

to all-----:) i am much happier now:)

Nivindya---hehe..haan u come and strangle her..hehehe...hoping to catch you online tuday...:)

Ranjan---there should be guys in evry project group!!! they are much easier to work with than many gurls!
I'll be careful of it next time!

amit---true..and i understand that but one does get frustu once in a while ,na?

Shreyansh--ooppsss..you did it!! hehe..

Pradyot Sir,---//don't hate fights
yuss..you are right..there are times when one has to fight, in fact should fight..i mean you cant go around taking rubbish from evryone on this planet ,na? I'll try and develop all this im me...but ..hmm..lets see...you are what you are ...

Abhi---yeah..i remember you had written a post on this once, or was it some part of a post? Then also i agreed with your logic( i was nodding my head as i was reading it) and i do so now also...Zero expectation ?? thats the best way out..but extremely difficult to achieve....
oh-my-gawd--- i replied to munnuz comment..this must have been the last comment you left before you were put behind bars...
p.s. gajar ke halooe mein dry fruits daalon ya nahin?

Anonymous said...

hey..wsnt able to catch u online today.
ill cal u soon ok?
bye!

Anonymous said...

c'mon ruchita... v all know what r college can be like.yes,chums made in schools are priceless and their worth becomes clearer as we push ahead in life.
college can give u sweet memories(in r case though its rare) and bitter experiences as well ...its the latter which is God's way of making us tough for life's battle ahead.u ex-martinians are supposed to be real brave n practical girls...aren't u? so cheers :)...ok

R said...

Nivindya---haan..sure..will wait for it :)

Kshitij Sir---:) i know ..i know all of it and i keep telling myself all this but then once in a while somethings get to me too much and i have recently found a grand way of venting my feelings..BLOGGER!!! :D
p.s. how was CAT??

Anonymous said...

cat..
:( ....hmmmmm....hmmmmm....thats a bad question. well..hmmm...

satishds said...

hi..i accidently stumbled into ur blog..its really gud.
hmm..life is like a sine wave some days and some are bad....enjoy :)

Anonymous said...

hmm....u were quite true there...LEts not throw our weight around...lets be polite and communicable,and open rather than being haughty and difficult...i hate the mess...i hate the rat-race and i wish we someday see the beauty of not being back-bitchers and conspirators.May god bless u.loads of bliss and excitement and euphoria for u.

Anonymous said...

dnt react ruchita.let him bark.it just shows on his own sick mind.

Canary said...

sendin u a smile and a hug.. :)
waise wen i go to such a sangeet, i concentrate on eating ! :p

R said...

Kshitij sir--arre..dun worry..achcha hoga!!! i know achcha hi hoga!!!

satish--welcum to mah blog!!:) hehehe:) sine wave..yess..us din i was at 270 degrees..:)

Kay--welcome to mah blog:)! and thanks for all the nice wishes..:)

abhi---hukum sar aankhoon par :)...chekd out the guys blog..hez nt worth reacting to :) i am chill :)

aastha--aah...u were absent for sucha long time:( in ur absence my female readership drops by 50%...aisa mat kiya karo:)

Anonymous said...

arre buddhu, there is nothing that can go right now...at least for this year.didnt u read my offlines?tragedy detail mein likhi hai:(

Obi Wan said...

Why is there no update on Meena and Waris? :-)

R said...

kshitij sir--hehe..i know i know..i read the offlines....i just mean that either ways achcha hi hai..like u have a decent job in ur hand na...so like next year when u take CAT u'l hvae the all important work ex!!

Obi wan--hehe..u remember them :) naah nuthing much happening on their front coz like Meenaz hubby s in jail or something right now and Waris's wife is insisting on talaq..heheh

Anonymous said...

oops.. dont get it wrong, but ur blogs gave me an impression that its 'ur' attitude thats causing problem. u r a book-worm and dont like interacting wid ppl.. when everyone was out in lunchtime u wr studying.. huh.. dont u think ye kuch dramebaaji lagti hai.
anyways i know u'll delete this post.. so i wont waste time writing more.
but a humble suggestion - try getting out of this fictious world, sont study all the time, and make some frnds.

R said...

well wishes waale bhaiya---no, i will nt delete ur comment.so,i am a dramebaaz????
Saahi pehchana, dost!!!
seriously.
jus one thing--next time u wish to leave a comment do so with ur name/ blogger id. I wud appreciate that much more.
Ram Ram!