Monday, January 02, 2006

Realizations....

One whole year gone by...another whole year gone by...just as a gust of the high winds rustles past you as you trek a mountain . It is past me..there is nothing that i can now change ,there is little that i want to change....
There are some forces of nature which one cannot disregard with impunity.I live far from Southern India but the Tsunami affected me...I live a considerable distance from Kashmir but the earthquake affected me....the apocryphal power of His greatest creation could do nothing in the face of His unmitigated fury....thousands and thousands perished and not much could be done other than mourn the departure of innocent lives from this world to the next.....
I have learnt some important lessons. The one that i have not learnt the hard way is the quiet virtue of speaking sweetly and politely.I do it coz i am inherently soft spoken and also due to my upbringing.In my family you are allowed to murder , kill, rob..but no, you can't speak rudely to anyone in the family.So it is ,in a way a habit now...but i have seen its advantages outside.According to Ma, it is the single most important quality a girl should have:D...Things have happened that have made me realise the importance of this....
I have also realized how important good health is .'05 was not very good from the health point of view . Four months ago i got German measles, it is not a big thing ( i just had rashes for about 3-4 days), but till it was not diagnosed ,living with slightly enlarged lymph nodes and with doctors telling me to get them removed (and get a biopsy done on the tissue ) does not exactly ensure a state of unbridled joy.
I have realized that ignorance can be bliss.
I have been amazed at how well i ..err..umm..how do i put this...read whats going on the minds of people i am close to. A small frown, an almost successful attempt at concealing a smile, a slight change in voice that could be coz the person is irritated/angry/tired . Ma gets irritated, she is like 'Cannot i think something without you knowing what i am thinking????':D :D The answer is simple.NO.
:D( See, its a simple thing.Ma has knwn me for as many days as i have known her.) This happens because of my overly sensitive nature, i know that and i wish it were not so . It's liberating to not know what is going through the minds of people around you.It is.
I have realized how important healthy relationships are . I don't have 60 best friends , infact i have few friends, but they are the best on this planet . It is amazing how someone can just listen to you and make you feel better. It is amazing how you can just listen to someone and make them feel better.
I have again realized how important hard work and honesty are. I don't care what the world thinks of me but I do care very much about whatI think of myself.
I have realized that I live according to some principles , I never knew that..quietly, unknowingly they decide which course of action I take. I do not cheat in tests or exams. In a practical exam I wrote the previous semester, we had to answer two 15 mark questions.I knew nothing about one question.No one in class did, but most people had 'pharraz' to help them out. The guy sitting next to me opened his answer sheet for me and asked me to copy everything that he was putting down.I had jotted down around four lines when I stopped, cancelled the entire page and spent the rest of the time on the first answer. I was so surprised at myself..I kept telling myself not be so stupid , it was a 15 mark question! But I did NOT WANT those 15 marks, I just did not! Do not conjure up grand visions of me feeling very grand about it; on the contrary, I felt wretched after I submitted the answer script. I was inconsolable. I called up Latika from college, then Ma..but nothing consoled me....but even today, I am okay with not having cheated then.aah..and the result of the exam? lets just say that i did well.... :)
I have realized that my family, even my extended family is very important to me .


well..these were reasonably abstract things that I have realized during this past year..As each year passes, I find myself mellowing, becoming more sensible, am able to understand others point of view better...in short, I am growing older each year!!!!!!!NAHIIIINNNNNN!!!!

18 comments:

ranjan said...

U and grow up...stop kidding :))

Raam Pyari said...

grow up kya??? here i am, closer to 80 than i ever was and ur talkin abt growing up????

atul lakhotia said...

copying a bit isnt such a bad thing...infact engg have to rely on ctrl-c and ctrl-v!!!...

dotty_pixie said...

a very well written post..subtle and to the point.

*I have realized that I live according to some principles , I never knew that..quietly, unknowingly they decide which course of action I take. *

you know,this is the funniest thing.one is supposed to know oneself the best,and last year i was shocked to realise that i don't know myself at all!in my case,it's only when i test myself and move out of my 'so-called' comfort zone that i discover more abt myself.(remembr,we talked abt this?)

similarly,im getting to know you better as im sure,vice versa!isn't it wonderful?discovering there are more layers to each other than we thot?
lots more to discover and lots more to love..:)

V said...

Omigosh .. I scored 42 in the stupid score :O:O
...and so nice of u to not cheat ...

!xobile said...

Yaar maatey... mazaa aa gaya teri last line pad ke. I have known people who celebrate happy bdays and happy new years but that moment, contrarily, makes me sad... bcoz i realize, age does not increase with them... rather decreases... people have ridiculed me for sayin that..




have again realized how important hard work and honesty are. I don't care what the world thinks of me but I do care very much about whatI think of myself.


tu to utha ke mera mind pad ke likh rahi hai apne blog pe! CHEATER HAI TU!

ahahahaha
just mazaakin.. waise even I dont really believe in cheating but i have not succeeding and have given into the temptation once or twice........

mast yaar
ash maar

amit said...

Oye yeh idea bhi mere se copied hai.... The only difference - i wrote whtever happened to me in last year in simple terms n u hv really made ur experience abstract....:). but u hv written well !!!!

but anyways wish u a very happy,'healthy' and prosperous new year....

Pradyot said...

*Applaud* Couldn't have summed up the year in a better way.
As for the reading of minds.. it is a painful power to have. I know.
Just let me not comment on the cheating part... I am too honest to lie.

Raam Pyari said...

atul : naah! its not a bad thing...its just i avoid it when possible and i had no idea i was so averse to it....

Nivindya: //similarly,im getting to know you better as im sure,vice versa!isn't it wonderful?discovering there are more layers to each other than we thot?
lots more to discover and lots more to love..:)

beautifully put :)
lots more to love and lots more to discover...
Ameeen..
p.s. you DONT come online!!!!

v: 42/30???
wah!wah! congratulations :D

vatsa: heyloo,putra......dekho there have to similarities between u and me...yeh usi wajah se hai..:)
//bcoz i realize, age does not increase with them... rather decreases

tujhme boht foresight hai, putra...ek 100 rupaye ki baat boli!!!!
i totally agree.....

Amit: Thankooooooo, i hope it shall be healthy!!!:)

hehehe....tumhare se copied hai???:D then i have juss one thng to say:
Plagiarism rox!!!!!!!! :D:D

Praddy://I am too honest to lie.

lolz!!!:D
As for the reading of minds...i know it is a painful power to have..cuz then to u begin to wunder if u can do something abt whats goin on in the mind of the person.....

!xobile said...

to ab de 100 rupiya! de na! plijj! mai mehnat aur khoon pasine bahaa ke aapke 100 rupiye sood samet lautaa dunga

DeePDiveR said...

I cant even read my own mind and you can read others'......amazing man! neway what new did u do on new years'

*`~. R a j .~`* said...

Hi ruchi ... inital part could have been better if posted as a poem ...
reading other's mind .. so u r a good friend to have !!

Nice Post indeed

Raam Pyari said...

vatsa: PUTRA!!!!!!! lalach buri bala hai!!!!!! hey prani, tu lalach ke moh mein na bandh!!!!!jaaaaaa, ja ke prashchit kar ke aa......parshchit ke liye mujhe 200 rupaye de!

deep: arre, half the time i have no clue about wats goin in my mind!!!!!!:D but yess,when it cumes to ppl i am close to...i read their minds thru their bodylanguage...its quite weird.:)

Raj: your first time here, na???
so welcomr to mah blog!!!
poem??? arre..i cant read poems, leave alone rite them!!!...i am hardly the poetic sorts, no matter how much i mite like to be ,though....

Ankur said...

Hi Ruchi,

Today I spent around 2 hrs in reading your blog. Nice blog!
Actually, whole day I was reading blogs only...reached at your blog
thru a long chain..I have lot to say on your personality :)Right now, I m too tired to comment..will do it some other time..

Raam Pyari said...

Ankur: ohmegawd!!!!two hrs!!!
btw, welcome to mah blog and yess....keep visiting :)

Shriedhar said...

Hi ruchi,nice post...
agreed wid ur frns concept..
"a true frn is one who stands by u even the entire remaining world turns against u..
It's not the quantity but quality that matters..
cheers..

Raam Pyari said...

heylo :)
welcome to mah blog,shreedhar..yess u are correct about frnds..cud not agree more!

Shekhar said...

Hi Ruchi, sorry for reading this post SOOO late, have been kept away for certain reasons. :(

But that doesn't take away the joy of reading this post. :) Super post, girl !! Just super...